Fighting my demons from within

It's been a LONG time since I've posted, for rational reasons. Sorry for the delay, but you know, with the "new and improved" me, I actually have a life now!

So, I've decided to clean out my closet (i.e. release my demons). I haven't had the "hunger" feeling for so long until now. I'm almost 11 months post-op and have lost 115lbs! WOW! As you might say. However, it's been rough the last month or so. I find myself wanting to "grab" something to fill a void. I can't do this. I REFUSE to do this! As I've stated before, this is a psychological surgery, in my opinion I will add. I had to go through psychological counseling prior to my surgery as an insurance requirement. During these sessions, I had to understand, and try to overcome what caused me to become the plus sized person I was. Why did I snack or choose the "wrong" types of food? The result consisted of simplicity...

I never thought having this surgery would be easy, but right now it's excrutiatingly hard! My husband got a new job working nights. I think that having him around filled that "void". Or, perhaps, I'm too embarrassed about what he'll say/think if I am eating the wrong foods or snacking. I don't want to fail and I'm deathly afraid of rejection or negative judgement. Now that he's gone, I find myself trying to fill that void with food/snacking. To avoid giving in to that inner demon, I made a list. A list of things to do instead of snacking. Here's what I've come up with:

1. Take the dogs for a walk (good exercise for me and them *win, win bonus*)
2. Ride my bike (again, great exercise)
3. Go to the gym (see a pattern here??)
4. Make a budget
5. Balance my checkbook
6. Clean house (2300 sq ft gets dirty quickly, I can find SOMETHING to clean!)
7. Take pictures (I love learning new things with photography)
8. Give the dogs a bath
9. Visit a neighbor
10. Go through my "junk" closet/room
11. Re-decorate
12. Call someone (I HATE when people eat while on the phone!)
13. Take a bath while reading a book
14. Pluck my eyebrows
15. Floss my teeth
16. Try new make-up

17. Arrange my clothes
18. Clean out my drawers
19. Straighten up my shoes
20. Wash my car
21. Make a crafty gift for someone
22. Weed the yard
23. Iron my clothes
24. Drink water
25. Paint my toes/finger nails

Now I could have said to read a book/magazine, surf the internet, IM/chat or blog, but, the fact is, those are things that are easily accompanied by a snack. How does one overcome these demons?? I've been stuck at the same weight for a month now. I'm glad it hasn't gone up, but I'm hoping for down... I still have 30lbs more that I'd like to lose. Then keeping it off will be the trick. I can do this, I know I can!